The one you can be yourself with, without the fear of being judged, The one you can travel miles with, even after knowing the roads will be rough.
Not only the one you remember when you are happy, But the one you go to when you are sad, The one that’s ready to love you, even when you are bad.
When the world is full of lies, The one with a truthful and friendly smiles. The one you can trust to never leave your hand, Even if you are miles apart, you know by your side they will forever stand. The one who wipes you tears and console your heart when it’s tired, That person who is ready to be with you without ever being retired.
You know when you messed up All night they will stay up Until your pain goes down, They are all ears for you When you want to pour your secrets From dusk till dawn.
The one who is your comfort and the one who is your peace, The one you can be ugly around and the one that can help you sleep.
The one that you never run from But the one you always run to, They say, ” Home can be a person too” And for me, that person is You.
Hey, you all already understood what we are going to talk about today. I feel being a girl myself it’s my moral responsibility to tell people the difference between Feminism and Fake Feminism. I have wanted to write about it for so long and now I’m finally doing it.
Feminism started when the World began to understand the need for Gender Equality. So as far as I know, Feminism is all about social, cultural, economical, educational, political and personal equality of women. Which, in simple words mean that women can live and work wherever she wants, dress up however she desires, eat whatever she craves, choose any occupation she dreams of, study whatever subject she likes, etc.
It’s basic, right?
That’s how we (the society) define equality.
If men can wear white jeans, a green shirt, a maroon belt, baby pink hat, eat a cheeseburger, study zoology and earn 25,000 per day then women can do it too.
Now, what’s Fake Feminism?
Well, I would define it as accessing your rights but disrespecting the right of others.
Example: Wearing a neon pink shirt yourself and judging if a guy does the same, saying “ We are girls we can wear that, you are a guy you can’t.”
Excuse me? Really?
Being a girl I strongly discourage such behaviour. Feminism was for “ equality ” if you don’t want to hear what you can and can not do then you have no right to tell someone else the same.
Another example: If a guy opens up it’s not okay because he is a guy and if a girl opens up then it’s okay because she is a girl. And if a guy opposes this then they say “ Oh shut up, you don’t know what we go through we bleed every month, we carry a baby for nine months ” etc. And then you’ll go posting things about feminism.
See, I respect that, okay, but we girls suffer all this doesn’t mean that boys don’t have problems to deal with or they have no right to open up. I’m not an Anti-feminist or a Pro-male-ist. What I’m trying to say is Feminism gives you equality, not the supreme power to oppress others or disrespect their rights.
Being Feminist is not a bad thing, helping women achieve their dreams or gain self-respect, self-confidence is a commendable act. But if you support a girl to be a soldier, fighter pilot, architect etc then support a guy who wants to be a fashion designer, makeup artist and painter too. Equality is what matters, that’s where this started from.
Please recognise the difference and kindly stop doing this, because it hurts me to watch that we are misusing the thing made for our benefit by using it against someone else.
Humanity is above all. Equality is above all. People supporting and being empathetic to each other is above all. And if you don’t get it, then I have nothing to say to you.
If you think I’m wrong then, please correct me. Your views, reviews and suggestions are most welcomed.
Love…let’s talk about this one thing everyone is so obsessed with. So what is “Love”? Just a chemical reaction in our bodies? Or an emotional roller coaster we deal with? Or just some overly beautiful thing we all want to happen to us? Whatever it is one thing is for sure, we all love the idea of “Love”, and the credit goes to Movies. Give them a sweet, romantic but tragic love story and people will madly fall for it, isn’t it? Sometimes I wonder when did the human race become so stupid. But who cares, right? We just love the “Love” that is presented to us. Every time it’s same but different in its own beautiful but weird ways.
But the real question is, does “Love” make us weak or strong? Well, I think both it’s just us who decide. It’s an energy and energy is neither created nor destroyed and we are the ones who give direction to it. It can either give us motivation or be a reason for our depression and sometimes it can be nothing, anything and everything all at once. Weird, right? But again, who cares? We all are in love with “Love”.
We are so desperate to be loved that we get ready to tolerate anything, any sort of misbehaving in the name of love. A person would be crushing our self-esteem or blaming us for his\her insecurities and just tell us that he\she loves us and The End. We will tolerate it all. Or if somehow you don’t, you will be expected to do it. You will be expected to go through all the miseries only because you love someone or you think the person loves you. Agree or don’t, believe it or not, but we all do it.
And I ask you Why?
Even if you are attached to that person or have feelings for them, at least ask yourself…“ Do I deserve this? Do I deserve this disrespect, this humiliation just because I love him\her? Does this person deserve me after what he\she is making me go through? Do I deserve distrust just because I had a past?”
The answer you’ll get will be the answer you needed and now the step you will take will be for your self-respect. If they call it your ego, let them do it. You know the reasons, you know you tried, you know what you have been through and that is enough. Not a single soul deserves the explanation.
Accept yourself, I know sometimes it’s difficult to accept your faults, shortcomings and flaws, but learn to accept yourself and learn to forgive yourself. Understand that you are just a human being and you can be imperfect because these imperfections are what make you truly beautiful.
The moon lights our path in the night but it has scars too, the sun that gives us warmth can burn us too, the ocean that sustains millions of lives have impurities too and it’s okay…trust me, it’s absolutely okay. The one who is made for you will love you for the imperfections too. He\she will accept you with all your shortcomings, will know the stories behind your fears and scars and will love you for who you truly are and will know how gorgeous you are even with your flaws. But first, you will need to fall in love with yourself. Because if you can’t, then no one can.
The day you’ll realise what I have written today, will be the day you will find your true love, and you will come to know that whatever you were looking for is present within you and always has been. You were just blinded by the expectations of people and yourself of how love is supposed to be and how you are supposed to be.
Trust me it will be better than what you imagined when it will be true because then you will be trusted, respected and taken care of in every single way you deserve. Till then just enjoy the process, love yourself and keep falling in love with the idea of “Love”.
Giving up is like running away from your problems. People say give up if you can’t get what you want and try something else. But I say never give up.
Don’t listen to your brain because it will always reason with you. It will always make you doubt yourself with tons of “what if”, “but”, “maybe” etc.
Just ask your heart this simple question, “how much this matters to me? ” or you can try “how much do I love this? ”
It can be anything. It can be a person, it can be a hobby you want to pursue as a career, it can be any goal you want to achieve, it can be a dream you want to fulfil, it can literally be anything.
Your heart will give you the true and unbiased answer of what you really want to do. And if your heart says “it matters to me alot” or “I love it so much”. Then my dear friend I request you not to give up.
I won’t lie to you, it will be extremely difficult and there will be times when you will doubt your decision and sometimes you will think that people were right and you’ll consider giving up. And trust me at that time giving up will be the easiest and safest option. But please don’t.
We have one life. We live only once. And everything, every single thing we truly love is worth the hard work, is worth trying.
You will have to deal with millions of “maybe this is not the right time”, “maybe this is not the right place” and “what will people think about me”.
So here’s a friendly reminder, you are the one who is going to decide the right time and the right place. I do believe in God and I believe God always helps the people who help themselves. Write your own story, believe in your aim, in yourself and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
And “people” will say whatever they want to say. Trust me it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with themselves. Everyone has to face critics in their journey. Use them as your motivation. Just remember that after quitting because of “what will people say/think about me” , one day when you will be regretting this whole decision making process and the outcome, those “people” will be nowhere to console you. All you will ever hear them say will be “ you shouldn’t have given up if you loved it so much”.
We are humans, we are hypocrites don’t listen to us. Listen to your inner voice and your heart. We will make you think you are a fool trying to fulfil your dreams but never listen to us. Because all we want is to pull you down to where we are and make you like ourselves, so do yourself a favour and don’t listen to us.
If you are a bird or a fish and you listen to a giraffe or a plant, then just imagine what you’ll end up doing. Or let’s see it this way, if you are birds and are of same breed but u have the ability to fly slightly higher than the others but you listen to them and hence fly at the same level as them. You are clearly doing injustice to yourself.
So I request you, don’t give up . We live once. Let’s spend it doing what makes us happy.
Think about it. Your view, reviews, suggestions and criticisms are most welcomed. Feel free to share it with someone you know needs this right now. Let’s tell each other that not all humans are bad and we can do good things too, we can support and motivate too.
I read it on the internet two years back and this is something I want all of you to read. It helped me so much at that time, you know, when you are a complete teenager, so full of dreams, so full of life and you have this passion to achieve everything you have ever wanted to and all. And deep down you are scared of whats and buts. Fear is the only thing that will limit you and stop you from being yourself. But ones you learn to accept the worst you will be the best, you have my words on this.
Here’s the poem.
“You are not scared of the dark, you are scared of what’s in it.
You are not afraid of hights, you are afraid of falling.
You are not afraid of people around you, you are afraid of rejection.
You are not afraid to love, you are afraid of not being loved back.
You are not afraid of letting go, you are afraid of excepting the truth that the person is gone.
You are not afraid of trying again, you are afraid of getting hurt for the same reason.”
– Ezinwanne Dominion
Now ask yourself, do all these things really matter? Can’t we overcome them and be the untamed, unedited version of yourselves? Yes sometimes we need to change for our own good but never for someone else to accept us.
We need to learn that it’s okay to have fears, it’s okay to be imperfect, it’s absolutely okay to not be okay but what is not okay is to let you fear limit the potential in you.
Think about it and share your thoughts in the comment.
Kulsoomified 